The Debate on Shoulders

Lately, I feel like there's been a huge debate on shoulders and modesty. Now, this possibly could be mostly in my head because of buying a wedding dress and picking bridesmaid dresses. There are two sides of the debate: Modest is Hottest or Because Shoulders are Sexy.
I saw a blog where a mom was critiquing the teenage girls that her sons are following on social media with on how the teenage girls chose to portray themselves on their personal social media.  She did this by blaming those girls for what they were wearing and how they were posing in their "selfies." Now, with her blog post, she shared pictures of her children in swim suits.  The boys were all shirtless.  Her littlest, a daughter in a bathing suit.  I found this to be very hypercritical!  There's an article that shows the original pictures she had on there before she went and changed them all to pictures of her children clothed.
That was a bit of a tangent, so, I'll get back to my original point. Is showing a shoulder way to sexy?  One point of view is, why does it matter? Men and boys should be taught how to control themselves!  If I choose to where a sleeveless dress or shirt, that does not give someone the right to think they can hurt me! These women who think that other people's daughters need to learn how to dress less provocatively to protect themselves should look in the mirror.  They should learn to teach their sons how to treat woman and girls with respect!
Then, there's the part of me that grew up in the culture that showing a shoulder was immodest. Even now, I see women at certain kind of events and think, "Wow. They believe that's appropriate." That is pretty horrible and judgmental on my behalf! I really don't think it now as much as I used too.It's along the lines of, how old is she? Is that appropriate for her age? Is that appropriate for the work place? Questions like those. One time, my boss said, "Why don't you dress like (said coworker)? Wear shells and things like she does!" Well, she wore things without sleeves. I didn't think that they are appropriate for work for that reason.
Now, I get to my point. My wedding dress: It's amazing!!! I can't wait to wear it and walk down the aisle. I was having a discussion with a friend about my dress who is a member of the LDS church. She asked if the dress was sleeveless/strapless. I said, well, yes, it is! She said, aren't you going to get a shaw or something for it? You should, I mean, November is cold! Now, the wedding is inside. It will be very climate controlled.
Update 7/24/14:
LOL! I started writing this months ago! The wedding went off without a hitch! The dress was/is amazing! My bridesmaids wore strapless dresses. They looked amazing!
I can't believe I left this blog hanging for so long. The emphasis on "Modest attire" has been out of proportion. So what if your shoulders are showing! If you're comfortable, fine! In Indiana, where Summer temperatures usually run in the 90's, (This Summer has been a strange exception!) not being stifling hot is important!
Time to move on.