This year, I just have a couple New Year's Goals.
The first goal is to loose weight. I would like to loose about 30 pounds. For my height, I'm am considered morbidly obese. The only thing is, even loosing just 30 pounds will still keep me on the obese size of the size chart, according to the doctor's office. This year, I'm saying publicly, I'm going to loose the weight!
My second goal is to increase the traffic to my Foodie Blog. Lately, it's been getting at least 30 hits a day. A lot of that traffic is from Pinterest. I'm going to find other ways to get my blog out there in the spotlight without going overboard.
My third goal is to improve my friendships. Keeping friendships as an adult is really hard, especially when in a relationship and that person really is your best friend. I want to work on being a better friend.
These are my New Year's Goals.
Monday, January 14, 2013
Saturday, January 12, 2013
Living in Poverty
When I was nine years old, my mom and my dad both got laid off from their jobs. The company my mom worked for, now known as Phillips Magnavox, decided to move all production to Mexico. The company my dad worked for, was loosing money and laying people off.
By the time I was eleven, our trailer had been repossessed, and my parents had filed bankruptcy. We went from a two income household to a zero income household. I didn't understand what was going on, besides the fact that we didn't have any money. Nobody ever tried to explain to me what was going on. Not one person sat me down and tried to explain what it means to be poor, or even the opposite, what it means to create a budget and save money.
Both of my parents searched and searched for jobs, but both of them being in their 50's, could not find anything permanent that made close to the amount of money they were making previously. My mother's previous employer paid for her to attend college, since she didn't have any higher education. She got an associates degree in business. My parents both spent time as substitute teachers.
My dad had jobs off and on. He got a job as a property manager at a storage unit facility. He lost that after 2 or three months.
We moved across town into a low income housing edition. My parents looked for jobs. My dad started working at Carrie Home For Boys on the night shift. After sixth grade, we moved again, into a house that we started renting. We lived all the way through my high school years.
This post is just a short history of being poor. Where am I going with this?
My parents NEVER talked money with me or my siblings. We always found out about things on the downward end. The loan that defaulted on my sister's car that she didn't even know about. The credit card my parents were helping me pay for in college, until one day, they just stopped paying the bill, without telling me. The loan my dad took out on my car without telling me, to fix it's transmission. The endless trips to Walmart, K-Mart, and Meijers that we really didn't have money for, but my parents went anyway.
I'm not trying to rat out my parents, but they didn't teach me anything about money. How to save it. How to spend it. How to not go in debt. I'm not trying to blame them either. I just had to learn for myself how to do these things.
This creates the Cycle of Poverty. My parents never gave me the education I needed to learn about money. Maybe it's the generation they grew up in. They are older, the age of most of my friends grandparents. Did anyone else in my age group grow up with this problem? Or did your parents educate you about the proper ways to earn, save, and spend money?
My sister and I had a talk one day about the ways are parents hid whole money issues from us. The secret loans. The trips to the stores. When they had money, they spent it!
I remember, when my uncle died, he gave my mom a sum of money. They bought a used car, which was needed. Then, they proceeded to drive it across the United States. That trip was to see family, but a lot of money was spent to do it. Maybe the rest of that money is how we were able to afford to move that year.
Now that my parents are older, they don't have the money to live off of. I feel horrible because I can't afford to support them and get them the assistance that's needed for this time in their life.
I had a small trust fund to pay for medicine after my transplant. I was told that to keep my insurance, I had to get rid of it. I bought a used car. This was to be safer driving to and from the hospital, which was a little over an hour drive each way. When it came down to it, my social worker asked where that money was. I explained to her that my parents told me to buy a car with it. She shook her head at me in disapproval. I obeyed what my parents had told me to do.
Now, I'm finally paying off the card I had charged most of my medicine on in college.
The current job I have is actually still paying me and keeping me at poverty level. I keep working at my job, because I enjoy it most of the time, and it provides me with insurance. I stated this before in previous blogs: Because I went to college, I have a lot of debt.
This post isn't to tear down my parents. I apologize if it looks like I'm trying to. I'm just trying to organize the thoughts in my head about my history with money. I want to break away from the poverty cycle that has been created in my family. According to other sources, it can take up to six generations to break that cycle. I don't want to be in that situation. I am only the second generation. I don't want my children to live through some of the experiences I have.
So, I will keep chipping away at my debt. I will get educated about money. I will learn how to teach my children about money.
By the time I was eleven, our trailer had been repossessed, and my parents had filed bankruptcy. We went from a two income household to a zero income household. I didn't understand what was going on, besides the fact that we didn't have any money. Nobody ever tried to explain to me what was going on. Not one person sat me down and tried to explain what it means to be poor, or even the opposite, what it means to create a budget and save money.
Both of my parents searched and searched for jobs, but both of them being in their 50's, could not find anything permanent that made close to the amount of money they were making previously. My mother's previous employer paid for her to attend college, since she didn't have any higher education. She got an associates degree in business. My parents both spent time as substitute teachers.
My dad had jobs off and on. He got a job as a property manager at a storage unit facility. He lost that after 2 or three months.
We moved across town into a low income housing edition. My parents looked for jobs. My dad started working at Carrie Home For Boys on the night shift. After sixth grade, we moved again, into a house that we started renting. We lived all the way through my high school years.
This post is just a short history of being poor. Where am I going with this?
My parents NEVER talked money with me or my siblings. We always found out about things on the downward end. The loan that defaulted on my sister's car that she didn't even know about. The credit card my parents were helping me pay for in college, until one day, they just stopped paying the bill, without telling me. The loan my dad took out on my car without telling me, to fix it's transmission. The endless trips to Walmart, K-Mart, and Meijers that we really didn't have money for, but my parents went anyway.
I'm not trying to rat out my parents, but they didn't teach me anything about money. How to save it. How to spend it. How to not go in debt. I'm not trying to blame them either. I just had to learn for myself how to do these things.
This creates the Cycle of Poverty. My parents never gave me the education I needed to learn about money. Maybe it's the generation they grew up in. They are older, the age of most of my friends grandparents. Did anyone else in my age group grow up with this problem? Or did your parents educate you about the proper ways to earn, save, and spend money?
My sister and I had a talk one day about the ways are parents hid whole money issues from us. The secret loans. The trips to the stores. When they had money, they spent it!
I remember, when my uncle died, he gave my mom a sum of money. They bought a used car, which was needed. Then, they proceeded to drive it across the United States. That trip was to see family, but a lot of money was spent to do it. Maybe the rest of that money is how we were able to afford to move that year.
Now that my parents are older, they don't have the money to live off of. I feel horrible because I can't afford to support them and get them the assistance that's needed for this time in their life.
I had a small trust fund to pay for medicine after my transplant. I was told that to keep my insurance, I had to get rid of it. I bought a used car. This was to be safer driving to and from the hospital, which was a little over an hour drive each way. When it came down to it, my social worker asked where that money was. I explained to her that my parents told me to buy a car with it. She shook her head at me in disapproval. I obeyed what my parents had told me to do.
Now, I'm finally paying off the card I had charged most of my medicine on in college.
The current job I have is actually still paying me and keeping me at poverty level. I keep working at my job, because I enjoy it most of the time, and it provides me with insurance. I stated this before in previous blogs: Because I went to college, I have a lot of debt.
This post isn't to tear down my parents. I apologize if it looks like I'm trying to. I'm just trying to organize the thoughts in my head about my history with money. I want to break away from the poverty cycle that has been created in my family. According to other sources, it can take up to six generations to break that cycle. I don't want to be in that situation. I am only the second generation. I don't want my children to live through some of the experiences I have.
So, I will keep chipping away at my debt. I will get educated about money. I will learn how to teach my children about money.
Friday, December 28, 2012
End of the Year Check List
At the beginning of this year, I posted some New Years Goals. Here's my year end review of how they went!
Goal #1: Get Healthier
I worked really hard on this. I started making smaller amounts of food, so I wouldn't have as much excess. I started buying healthier foods. I started a Healthy Eating Support Group on Facebook. I still have a few things I need to focus on and work on in this category, but I've got a huge start.
Goal #2: Work on things for my choir!
My choir, the Indy Adult Show Choir has almost made it to it's fourth year in existence! In May, we had one of our most complicated shows to date, From Africa to the Islands. We also had a Summer Pop Show, Christmas Show, and two other Public performances!
This year, we became an official non-profit organization, thanks to Melanie. In the next month or two, we will become tax exempt! It's been a big year for my choir!
Goal #3: Get my financial situation under control!
In two months, one of my credit cards, my one that has been my biggest issue and pain in my life, will be paid off! WOOOHOOO!!!! After that, I'll start paying down my other card. I'm starting to get closer with the financial situation under control.
I'm going to have too work on my New Years Goals for next year. These three that I had for this year will keep going, but I might add too the list!
Goal #1: Get Healthier
I worked really hard on this. I started making smaller amounts of food, so I wouldn't have as much excess. I started buying healthier foods. I started a Healthy Eating Support Group on Facebook. I still have a few things I need to focus on and work on in this category, but I've got a huge start.
Goal #2: Work on things for my choir!
My choir, the Indy Adult Show Choir has almost made it to it's fourth year in existence! In May, we had one of our most complicated shows to date, From Africa to the Islands. We also had a Summer Pop Show, Christmas Show, and two other Public performances!
This year, we became an official non-profit organization, thanks to Melanie. In the next month or two, we will become tax exempt! It's been a big year for my choir!
Goal #3: Get my financial situation under control!
In two months, one of my credit cards, my one that has been my biggest issue and pain in my life, will be paid off! WOOOHOOO!!!! After that, I'll start paying down my other card. I'm starting to get closer with the financial situation under control.
I'm going to have too work on my New Years Goals for next year. These three that I had for this year will keep going, but I might add too the list!
Tuesday, December 25, 2012
Christmas... exhaustion...
Feeling a little down today, and honestly, I have been down since Friday. I'm over the Holiday Season. It's not my favorite time of year. It never has been. I've always hated Christmas music, and there are other reasons that I hate this time of year.
Yesterday was especially bad. I had to call an ambulance for my dad and admit him to the hospital. I've been in my pj's all day, but now, I have to shower, get dressed, and pretend all is well for Ian's family. I'm a little sick of putting on my game face lately.
And we need to do all of this and get back home before the forecasted blizzard starts... oh yeah.
Yesterday was especially bad. I had to call an ambulance for my dad and admit him to the hospital. I've been in my pj's all day, but now, I have to shower, get dressed, and pretend all is well for Ian's family. I'm a little sick of putting on my game face lately.
And we need to do all of this and get back home before the forecasted blizzard starts... oh yeah.
Sunday, December 16, 2012
The Church Clothing Discussion: Is it really about Sunday best?
Here's a few comments I made on the wearing pants to church Facebook page.
I've seen young men turned away from serving the Sacrament in my ward due to the color of shirt they were wearing. I saw a young man say, "Is it okay if I serve Sacrament?" and the Bishop told him to go find someone else to do it. He was wearing a dark purple button up shirt and a tie. It was gorgeous, and he looked very nice, yet he wasn't allowed to serve. (Those shirt and tie sets were all the rage last Christmas, and probably still are this year!) Anyway, this is just a random comment.
I do feel like there is plenty of sexism in my Ward, even with my calling, which I just resigned. I will be wearing pants this Sunday.
This was a response to a post:
I do feel like, as Michelle said, we should be understanding and gentle to anyone's feelings that do feel closer to the lord through attire, if that is what makes them happy!
When I was in a YSA branch, a young woman wore a lower cut shirt and a skirt. She was a less active member. I thought she looked fine or even really nice that day. The branch President walked over right before Sacrament started in whispered in her ear. She instantly started crying! This wasn't over pants, but a shirt. I don't remember if she came back after that. I think she decided to go to the family ward instead. I was really upset for her that day, but I thought that branch President wasn't very tactful anyway! Many of the women of the branch were immediately by her side to comfort her! Why was that "OK" for the branch President to do that? I don't think it was!
I do feel like woman are treated completely different in the LDS church. Some women bring it on them selves. To get the comment from a fellow sister, "Oh, that's sad! You're not married! You don't get to have the Priest Hood in your home!" Seriously?! Just because I chose to go to college, get a degree, and start a career, you think it's ok to say that? It's very condescending!
One person said to me, in a very condescending way, "My life is going so perfect! I'm getting married in the temple! I know it's only been three months, but this is what I prayed for! Not that your relationship isn't good..." At 24 years old, they've been married for a year, and now, are getting divorced. Maybe she was ignorant in how hurtful that comment was, but she wouldn't have put the disclaimer at the end if she didn't.
I've been with my boyfriend for over two and a half years. We met online. He is not a member of the church. I'm perfectly ok with that.
A man moved into my ward that is an AMAZING organist. Being the music chair, I requested of the Bishop that he would receive a music calling. I was told, that all of the Sunday School positions would have to be filled first, before he would get a music calling!
I felt that sexism was involved. I even mentioned this to other people, and I was told that, Priest Hood positions have too be filled first!
I wore pants to church today in honor of all of those women who have received these comments. Educated women that have started careers and not rushed into marriage.
It's not just about attire. I don't want the Priest Hood. I'm just sick of women being treated like second class citizens! I did see another sister, maybe even two today that also wore pants. Good for them. Maybe I start wearing them more often! The Winters in Indiana sure are cold!
I've seen young men turned away from serving the Sacrament in my ward due to the color of shirt they were wearing. I saw a young man say, "Is it okay if I serve Sacrament?" and the Bishop told him to go find someone else to do it. He was wearing a dark purple button up shirt and a tie. It was gorgeous, and he looked very nice, yet he wasn't allowed to serve. (Those shirt and tie sets were all the rage last Christmas, and probably still are this year!) Anyway, this is just a random comment.
I do feel like there is plenty of sexism in my Ward, even with my calling, which I just resigned. I will be wearing pants this Sunday.
This was a response to a post:
I do feel like, as Michelle said, we should be understanding and gentle to anyone's feelings that do feel closer to the lord through attire, if that is what makes them happy!
When I was in a YSA branch, a young woman wore a lower cut shirt and a skirt. She was a less active member. I thought she looked fine or even really nice that day. The branch President walked over right before Sacrament started in whispered in her ear. She instantly started crying! This wasn't over pants, but a shirt. I don't remember if she came back after that. I think she decided to go to the family ward instead. I was really upset for her that day, but I thought that branch President wasn't very tactful anyway! Many of the women of the branch were immediately by her side to comfort her! Why was that "OK" for the branch President to do that? I don't think it was!
I do feel like woman are treated completely different in the LDS church. Some women bring it on them selves. To get the comment from a fellow sister, "Oh, that's sad! You're not married! You don't get to have the Priest Hood in your home!" Seriously?! Just because I chose to go to college, get a degree, and start a career, you think it's ok to say that? It's very condescending!
One person said to me, in a very condescending way, "My life is going so perfect! I'm getting married in the temple! I know it's only been three months, but this is what I prayed for! Not that your relationship isn't good..." At 24 years old, they've been married for a year, and now, are getting divorced. Maybe she was ignorant in how hurtful that comment was, but she wouldn't have put the disclaimer at the end if she didn't.
I've been with my boyfriend for over two and a half years. We met online. He is not a member of the church. I'm perfectly ok with that.
A man moved into my ward that is an AMAZING organist. Being the music chair, I requested of the Bishop that he would receive a music calling. I was told, that all of the Sunday School positions would have to be filled first, before he would get a music calling!
I felt that sexism was involved. I even mentioned this to other people, and I was told that, Priest Hood positions have too be filled first!
I wore pants to church today in honor of all of those women who have received these comments. Educated women that have started careers and not rushed into marriage.
It's not just about attire. I don't want the Priest Hood. I'm just sick of women being treated like second class citizens! I did see another sister, maybe even two today that also wore pants. Good for them. Maybe I start wearing them more often! The Winters in Indiana sure are cold!
Friday, December 14, 2012
What's wrong with Socialism?
Seriously? And I mean this in the most innocent way possible.
Do you attend a church? I do. And this was the story told with a talk a couple weeks ago:
A city in Mexico (or South America somewhere) had a drought, but most of them were prepared with extra provisions from the year before. All except one family. For some reason, this family was not prepared. So, what happened? The church family, or church members provided for that family, making sure that they had enough to eat to make it through the coming months.
Isn't this Socialism? Isn't this what most churches teach? The church family will provide. That body of people will make sure that the family without provisions is able to survive in a time in need.
If you are a believer and attend church on a regular basis, do you believe in Socialism? Why or why not?
You can say, "Well, they were full tithe payers, so, they deserve the help!" But that isn't always true. I know a lot of churches out there that help anyone, member or not, tithe payers or not.
I'm starting to lean to a Socialist society. I know people abuse the system. A LOT OF PEOPLE. But I mean the people that aren't. The ones that need insurance. The ones that need food and clothing.
I know the difference. After a stint of working at Walmart in college, I could tell the difference between a family that was really trying to get by, and the Hautian (a person from Terre Haute, IN) screaming at me, because the beer and cigarettes were not covered by the state debit card.
There are also people that don't only abuse the system, but abuse church programs that help families out. I knew a family when I was in elementary school, that had the children join the LDS church. That way, they could receive food from the Bishop's Storehouse to help them out. That arrangement didn't last long, but it happened. I'm sure it's not the first or last time either.
If you're a believer or a Christian, are you for or against socialism and why?
Do you attend a church? I do. And this was the story told with a talk a couple weeks ago:
A city in Mexico (or South America somewhere) had a drought, but most of them were prepared with extra provisions from the year before. All except one family. For some reason, this family was not prepared. So, what happened? The church family, or church members provided for that family, making sure that they had enough to eat to make it through the coming months.
Isn't this Socialism? Isn't this what most churches teach? The church family will provide. That body of people will make sure that the family without provisions is able to survive in a time in need.
If you are a believer and attend church on a regular basis, do you believe in Socialism? Why or why not?
You can say, "Well, they were full tithe payers, so, they deserve the help!" But that isn't always true. I know a lot of churches out there that help anyone, member or not, tithe payers or not.
I'm starting to lean to a Socialist society. I know people abuse the system. A LOT OF PEOPLE. But I mean the people that aren't. The ones that need insurance. The ones that need food and clothing.
I know the difference. After a stint of working at Walmart in college, I could tell the difference between a family that was really trying to get by, and the Hautian (a person from Terre Haute, IN) screaming at me, because the beer and cigarettes were not covered by the state debit card.
There are also people that don't only abuse the system, but abuse church programs that help families out. I knew a family when I was in elementary school, that had the children join the LDS church. That way, they could receive food from the Bishop's Storehouse to help them out. That arrangement didn't last long, but it happened. I'm sure it's not the first or last time either.
If you're a believer or a Christian, are you for or against socialism and why?
Monday, December 3, 2012
When Ugly Shoes Happen to Good Women
I saw woman wearing a pair of Clarks today that are a Mary Jane style. She is probably in her later 40's. These were black shoes, and she was wearing bright red socks with them! This woman is long and lean. She's beautiful! She's successful! She wearing shoes that aren't age appropriate!
Clarks are some of the most comfortable professional shoes on the market. I wear them too! I just hate when adults wear Mary Janes! Very few woman have the right style to pull them off.
I know this comes from years of trying to find comfortable shoes in the 4,5,6 women's sizes that don't look too childish. Mary Janes are made for four year olds. Now, if you're wearing a cute skirt with your Mary Janes, and cute tights or something, maybe you can pull that off and not look like your trying to relive your childhood style. I am not one of those women.
There are other shoes that are out there that scream, "These shoes are really not for older women!" For instance, I found some "boots with the fur" last week. They are to replace a pair of boots I've been wearing for five years. I do worry that someone might find they are not age appropriate for me, or they make me look like I'm trying to be a teenager again.
I've bought shoes at the store, and then, worn them once and realized, "These look way too young for me!" I have too be really careful to not do that! I don't make rash decisions about shoes like I used too!
I feel for women right now. A lot of the styles of shoes that are out right now are lackluster. It's almost embarrassing to see what the shoe industry thinks we should be wearing these days!
Dear Women buying shoes:
Take a stand against ugly shoes! Don't let shoe companies push them on you! Tell shoe companies, We want stylish AND comfortable! Don't let companies like Crocs and Toms push their styles on you. Only three year olds and teenagers can get away with wearing those shoes! Women should feel beautiful in their shoes!
*This is my opinion. If you don't agree, I'm ok with that. We can still be friends and not agree on everything!
Clarks are some of the most comfortable professional shoes on the market. I wear them too! I just hate when adults wear Mary Janes! Very few woman have the right style to pull them off.
I know this comes from years of trying to find comfortable shoes in the 4,5,6 women's sizes that don't look too childish. Mary Janes are made for four year olds. Now, if you're wearing a cute skirt with your Mary Janes, and cute tights or something, maybe you can pull that off and not look like your trying to relive your childhood style. I am not one of those women.
There are other shoes that are out there that scream, "These shoes are really not for older women!" For instance, I found some "boots with the fur" last week. They are to replace a pair of boots I've been wearing for five years. I do worry that someone might find they are not age appropriate for me, or they make me look like I'm trying to be a teenager again.
I've bought shoes at the store, and then, worn them once and realized, "These look way too young for me!" I have too be really careful to not do that! I don't make rash decisions about shoes like I used too!
I feel for women right now. A lot of the styles of shoes that are out right now are lackluster. It's almost embarrassing to see what the shoe industry thinks we should be wearing these days!
Dear Women buying shoes:
Take a stand against ugly shoes! Don't let shoe companies push them on you! Tell shoe companies, We want stylish AND comfortable! Don't let companies like Crocs and Toms push their styles on you. Only three year olds and teenagers can get away with wearing those shoes! Women should feel beautiful in their shoes!
*This is my opinion. If you don't agree, I'm ok with that. We can still be friends and not agree on everything!
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